Unknown 9/2020
What can I do to make myself not thinking all of talking over the texts?!

It's too good to the fact that we have some similar feeling and 'common sense' about our society; his and mine. 
We both feel like we are the aliens different from other people in terms of ethics and morality. I mean, we feel we should obey simple laws and regulations but others seem to ignore the facts regards the safety.

The more I get to know about him, the more I feel admire him.. We have various topics to discuss and he also teaches me some Spanish which is great, too.

The thing is, he was a lover back then. He had seen quite a bunch of girls whilst me, I only had one serious relationship in the past. 

I just haven't had any chance to develop any relationship with anyone any longer. It's not that I choose too much. There's just no one come around me to be chosen or someone did come but they just didn't feel like to be in relationship. Then I was broken again just because I was one-side loving. Also I don't put myself out there much as I am so introvert in many aspects.

This is like a pattern of my life to occasionally get back to be in touch with some people I've known way backdated in school times.  Normally they are classmates or acquainted classmates.  I have no problem bonding with them at all.  Unless they aren't friends that I know before, the connects have always never last. 
And this time, I have a feeling that we may not last...
We used to be classmates in some classes.  We had never ever talked at all, neither in any class or time off-class.

Just thinking about the unknown future that seems to be no "us", I feel very dejected.  How could life play me like this?  I used to believe in some sort of happy ending with someone who cares and really enjoys having me in their life.

I am having less and less hope to meet someone like that, someone they called soulmate.  
Does soulmate really exist? 
Perhaps not for me.  I don't know and I think I don't want to know it anymore..

Written in this book
2020 Unknown (ended)
It's a new year with new chapters in one's life but when someone in the past has returned. Two people who would like to keep growing their friendships strong. And it's clearly now that there is no 'us' together in the future.
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