"One letter to you who I still adore in secret"
Dear you, 
It still hurts. 
I don't want to think that it still hurts, but it is. 
Strange, isn't it?

It's been years. 
If I can turn back time, I'd stop myself from falling for you. 
"What's the worst that could happen?"
Oh my, you didn't know a thing, dear me. 

I think.. you might regret being so gentle with me, too. Like I do. 
I regret depending on you for smiles and for some emotional support during all those time. 
I regret that moment when I saw you as the beautiful person you are.
I regret letting my heart beat faster for you, and hoping that I could be near you. 

I regret that I have to regret anything at all.

Dear you,
You are such gentle person.
For me, still, you are the best first love - or crush, I could ever hope for.
But it hurts.
Loving you hurts.

It's been years.
When will this end?
Will it ever end?

I don't know.
I'm sorry that I'm hurt.
I'm sorry that loving you can be this painful.
 
And I'm sorry for causing you to feel pained because I'm pained.
 
I don't want this anymore. 
This one side, unrequited love, I don't want it anymore. 
I'm sorry that it takes this long for me to say it to myself, 
but I want to be happy too. 

...
But most of the time, happiness comes with the thought of you. 
Silly me, dear first love. It seems like I'm still stuck with you, after all. 



11.07.2017
8:20 pm. 
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